I have a gift. In any situation, I can quickly and easily see all the ways that it can go wrong. Maybe I missed a calling as an actuary or something, but this gift of mine contributes to a perpetual battle with worry regarding my kids.
Today I was watching as Peter climbed up onto the couch and started jumping. Peter, my poorly balanced toddler who just got a boot off for a fractured leg, was jumping on the couch. I don't think that should have been a big deal but all I could see were all the ways that he could fall and get seriously hurt.
Marty was closer to him than I was, so I watched silently and decided not to heed my worries. I'm always looking for ways to mitigate my worrisome thoughts and replace them with something healthier. At least sometimes I can see when the worry isn't worth it.
As I watched Peter jump on the couch I started to wonder if people who don't worry like I do see the possibilities of something more easily or more clearly than they see the risk. Maybe their child jumps on the couch and they see their child improving their balance and strength. Maybe they see the child learning to explore and use their imagination.
I have to work hard to see those things. They don't flood to my mind like the dangers do. I'm going to make a conscious effort to look for possibilties. And maybe eventually that will start to counterbalance my instinct to flee from all risk.
Labels: Motherhood, Personal Growth